Pain

I am writing this with much pain and heartache. I had to give up our adoption. I am having medical issues that extend further than adoption. I have to put myself first for the first time in my adult life. I feel that Dillon/Maxim and Tania/Zhenya are my kids. I have struggled with this decision for 4 months. It does me no good to adopt children, if I am unhealthy. It's not fair for them, if I keep dragging them along. They deserve a loving home. I need several surgeries this year. If and when I am done, if either are still available I WILL come get them. I love them, with all my heart. I hope and pray that I am not looked down apon. I love them enough to give them another chance. These kids deserve to be loved and cherished. I just can't give them my whole self right now. Now.....6 months from now is a different story:).  If you want to know anything about either, please contact me. These are great kids. They deserve a family.

They are on reeces rainbow http://reecesrainbow.org/79033/dillon

http://reecesrainbow.org/?s=Tania

Tania my princess

Well, after much prayer and many answers...all the same we have decided to bring home Tania also. You can see how much I have thought about her over the years in my first blog post. I'm sure there will be those that will not understand this decision, but we do. There are so many people that do understand completely and support us.  She will benefit so much with a mommy...and a family. I can't imagine her confusion of being moved from place to place several times. She is now moved to the new Happy Home 2 and lives next door to Max/Dillon. She grew up with him for most of her life then was moved away while the 2nd home was being built. Because of Maya's Hope and many other donors these kids are now living cleaner and better than ever in the past. She has always been quite the loner, I'm sure just wondering what her place is in this world. Well, we would like to be that place. She is looking so much better than previously.

Her head is no longer shaved,

and she is looking more like a little girl.


We are working on immediate costs right now. It will take $1250.00 to committ to her, but it has to be donated in our immediate funds paypal donation fund on the right. We are working on this at home to, so whichever comes 1st , the 1st 1250 get her our committment on Reece's Rainbow. She has my heart and I cannot wait to wrap my arms around her.

Its been a long time since my last post. We are still adopting, it just took a while to puts some odds and ins together.  So we are basically at the beginning, but going full force. Ukraine adoptions go by much quicker than Russia, so we have to be prepared to just go! The kids in our little boy's institution are leaving to new homes left and right, which is a miracle really. These kids weren't even known a year ago, now because of a few people who care they have been introduced to the world and now have families, whereas they had no hope before.  I am setting up this page for my fundraising. There are 2 separate donation buttons....One is for those who need to have tax deductions for their donations. This money is not available to us until we travel. The other is our paypal account which will be available to us immediately for our immediate expenses.  These are : Home Study update, USCIS/government approval, facilitator fees, airplane travel, and document processing. THIS is the most important to us at the moment. Every little bit is allot. I absolutely hate this part of adoption. It may be my pride, but it is really hard to ask for donations. BUT...seeing my daughter that we adopted 2 years ago, and the happiness she lives every day, makes it easier to do, because of its cause. It is worth sucking up my pride. I just thought I would take this post and put up our donation buttons. I will start keeping everyone updated on all that is going on :)

I'm writing today with such a full heart. Let me start by telling you a little about Mila. Mila was born in Krasnoyarsk, Russia. She was born to a mother, a Senior Professor with a PhD in Science/Chemistry  and a Father who is a Senior Professor, both at a major University in Siberia. They are established and have been married for many years. Mila was born 4 years ago today, November 27th 2009 and was abandoned 2 days later, because she has Down syndrome.
I do not hold any ill feelings against her birth parents. They didn't know. They were more than likely told that this would be best for them and the baby. They do not have the same awareness that we have here in America. I often look at Mila's beauty and wonder what her parents and sister look like today.
I often joke about Heavenly Father sending her down across the world so I could "play" Where's Waldo with my kids. Well, it took me 1.5 years to find her, but I found her! He hid her GOOD :)
I was sent an updated picture of her, when we were "on the fence" about a few little girls. When I opened up the attachment with her picture in it, I KNEW. I knew 100 % she was MINE. I showed the picture to my husband and he said "that's the one."

Mila officially became ours on February 22nd 2012. An Orphan NO MORE. Just a few months shy of the Russian government banning all US adoptions of Russian children. We could have lost her had it been just a couple more months. If we had not had the selfless donors that we had and one AMAZING substantially large donation from an amazing family, we might have missed out on the blessing of Mila. I can honestly say, there is not one single day that goes by..not one...that I do not think of these people. This particular large donor told me that he felt strongly that I needed to get her home sooner than later...wow. Thank goodness for promptings, AND people that listen to them.

So, a little about Mila. She is happy, and loves her family. This little girl loves her Momma more than any child I've ever seen. She trust her mom and dad. She trusts and loves her brother and sisters, though that took a little longer. She has a "favorite" sibling that she adores. She can't sit still for too long. She loves food...ALL food. She appreciates things immensely. She is a quick learner and loves books. She loves Micky Mouse, Sofia the First, Doc McStuffins and Peppa Pig. She often has a small paint brush/makeup brush or a toothbrush in her hand, rubbing it on her lips or sucking on it. She loves water..everything about it, drinking it, playing in it, pouring, bathing in it..everything and anything you can do with it.

Mila loves to dance. She is really good at it, like REALLY good. She loves music. She is very observant and imitates things she sees. She uses sign language very well. She is deathly afraid of loud noises. She is scared to death of the 4th of July, sirens, and car washes. It is like she has had a scary experience with something loud. It is a TRUE fear.

Mila will wave at someone if she sees that I know them, but will NOT let anyone pick her up. She is extremely cautious of people. She does not trust anyone outside of her immediate family to hold her or get too close to her. She will let my sister Kelly, whom we see often, pick her up for a second, but that is long enough. She loves deeper than anyone I've ever known. She looks into my eyes while I hold her with such pure love. It takes a lot of time for her to open up to anyone, but once she does...it's forever, and completely unconditional. She has always come to my dad, she has never been afraid or leery of him. He has held her for a few seconds before at our house, but she always gets right down. Recently we had family pictures. Mila of course runs to me or yells "no" if anyone gets too close talking to her. THEN...out of nowhere...it happened!!!

She went to my dad, and he held her for a looong time. My Heart. I cannot explain in words what this did to my heart. I love them both. 

Giving birth to Hope, my biological daughter with Ds, changed my life. Adopting Mila changed the way I view life.